Rest

After a week of getting into trouble (again) for lies, Daniela is finally off punishment.  Then, today she does something she KNOWS she is not to do.  While she is in punishment, she usually does something else.  Super frustrating, to say the least.

I must admit, I think she thinks the same thing I do...why?  I try to talk it out with her.  She doesn't ever have much to say.  She doesn't even understand herself. 

Some days I am great and rely on the Spirit to help me have self control and other days I fail and raise my voice wondering why she causes such chaos so often.  

Staring at me at the end of the bed in silence, she just crawled into my bed quiet as can be.  Pushed her whole warm body up against my legs and side and fell asleep.  I am freezing from being in the rain working this AM, and I am glad she did.  Being loving and showing love through touch is hard for her and she is often cold and rigid.

I have never seen her take a nap in a 1 year and 8 months. 

She is exhausted. 

She exhausts me.

Love

*laying in bed, but can't sleep because I need to tell you guys this first

As I stood in worship today, my soul was overwhelmed with the young American boys that attend the campus program for troubled teens. As I watched them sing, I closed mouth smiled and kept tears from falling from my eyes. God is up to something big. I love this group of boys! I visioned myself placing a hand on each head, asking God which one, Lord, which one?"  I could literally feel something happening in the room.  Whose heart are you tugging at, God?  I prayed prayers over all of them, back and forth. Hedge of protection. Grow them in You. Make them leaders.

I leaned into Luke and Naomi to say Jamie (their house parent-Holy Spirit in him) is transforming these boys' lives. They are worshipping. Luke said , "I know I'm about to cry over here!"  I said, "me too!"

After service I went to go chat with Jamie and started to cry telling him what good work he's up to. I was so overwhelmed, again,  crying more than being able to talk. My spirit was so happy, tears just fell. Overwhelming love of God filling me. His power overtaking me.

What does he say?

One of the boys just got Saved.

Of course.

Love.

Jesus.