March 6th I boarded a plane from TPA to MIA at 435PM, final destination: Dominican Republic.
Seriously? I am a little shocked, too, that 6 months has come already. I just grabbed my journal to read what I wrote that day: I keep asking God for strength to do this alone. He told me Josh 1:9. So, I keep saying it (over and over again) and it helps give me relief.
I remember that day so vividly. I told myself not to cry, not once, or I would continue to breakdown. So I played calm as much as I could to everyone around me.
***Joshua 1:9 This is my command—be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”
I posted the rest of that journal a few blog entries ago and talked about dying to oneself and wanting to do His will for my life, yet desperately wanting to hold on to America. So, God told me to go to a different church a few weeks ago, so I got up and went to see this young girl that attends their school program for teen rehabilitation/church. I had felt her on my heart for a couple weeks, so I went. She gravitates towards me when I see her. I am still praying about that situation. So, there was a seat open next to her, of course. During the sermon the pastor spoke about dying to oneself and stated that he wasnt even sure what that "really" means. I realized I had my journal in my purse...why? I dont even know. I dont carry it. I dont even write in it as much. It was a beautiful gift my friend, Chase, gave me with Bible verses on each page the day I left Chain of Lakes Elem. So, I took the journal out and told the young girl next to me that I DID know what it meant and let her read my journal's first entry in coming to the country (I freaking love God and how He works). She asked if I didnt like it in the DR and I told her "it didnt matter. However, I do love the DR, but it wasnt ever in my plans." I still cannot believe I moved here. I live here. She asked how long I would be here and I gave her my answer that I say to everyone: When God tells me to go elsewhere.... but I am pretty sure He has me here for a lifetime.
As for what I am up to in this country, who knows, really. I am just here waiting on God. I am still at JCS teaching 1st grade. I will definitely blog on that soon. have a new roommate, Kelsey. I am seriously blessed with 2 great, Jesus-loving ladies to live with! I have enjoyed our late night Jesus talks and being in this same house for a purpose, growth in Him through each other. Kelsey is also my intern in first grade. This is the First Grade House!
So I am waiting for direction. Next steps. Something, God. Something. One time His voice was so LOUD and clear to move me here. If you didnt read that part, go back. He was LOUD. He was CLEAR in His promise of guiding and watching over and counseling me in my steps. Psalms 32:8 I never once said, "I THINK God said" during that time. I knew exactly what He was saying. I MISS THAT! I NEED THAT.
God has used me for years as a spiritual coach to so many people; mainly women, but not always limited to just them. I just realized this a few weeks ago when I started a new book in a little group Luke started on Christian Coaching. I saw the pattern before, but not so strategic. So, sometimes, it is friends that I only stay in touch with for the sporadic questions about Him through email, textplus, or Facebook. Some are my girls from work or my old Jesus Group. Sometimes, I barely know them. We may not be BFFs but it is an intimate friendship to just be honest and the door is open to ask whatever. Most of the time it is a message through Facebook of people searching for answers. God is good. He can and will use anything, including Facebook. When it comes to God, I am very honest and tell you like it is... it is relaxed, not rehearsed, and I think that is why I get messages on almost a weekly basis from people asking how I got to know Him this way. I dont have all the answers and I dont know half the answers most Christians know...(I looked at my friend Trevor in church a few weeks ago when he was in the DR and said, I dont even know all the books locations in the Bible!)....I should practice some little ditty to learn them!! but I do know Jesus in a very personal way. A very different way.
If you've ever had a conversation with me, I bet I squeezed in the love of my life, Jesus, when I got some minutes...and it may have been in a bar :) ...I want you to know Him.
I say all that because last week one of my friends steered me in a new direction. Something, I am not use to when it comes to God. I am usually focused and on track. I GIVE Christian advice and coach others. It's what He has prompted me to do for years. I am not a surface friend, I go deep. I want to invest energy in others growth in Him. I want you to thirst for Him the way I do. As Christians, we should make disciples and coach each other in growth...at least that is what we should be doing as Followers.
Who is in your zone of proximal development??? (Okay that is an educ term, but I can so see it applying to Christian discipleship). It's an honest question to ask yourself...
So, Heather came out and told me that I need to get back on track with reading my Bible, listening to worship music, and listening to sermons online. (Note: this is what I NEED to hear His voice) I had gotten so off track of getting in my time with Him and didnt realize how far I let it go. It is far harder to live with people than I realized!! I don't have hours a day anymore of spending just with Him. I talk with people more and let the other things slip. She was stern, or atleast, I took her text that way. I needed to hear it and she said it. Sometimes, people do that in our lives. We need to listen and do it when it is Biblical advice. I was just use to being the one helping others work through thoughts and things; what to do to stay or get on His path for life. Thanks, Heather <3 She has been sending me vital scripture that is always on target. God is awesome like that. She reminds me what He has done and will do. I've been grateful God has put her in my life and is growing her little heart in Him. I miss talking with God like I use to and I am making time again for what is imperative in my life: Him. I cant do it without Him. I dont know what to do next. I am playing follow the Leader here! I don't move an inch without Him directing the step. I saw Him blow it out of the water before and I'll wait to hear the next direction. I was waiting for the bathroom today and started to talk to God about something so insignificant. I instantly smiled when I realized I was talking to Him casually again! I whispered, "Oh, how I miss this Lord. Keep me here. Drawwwwwww me close."
I was walking with Kelsey the other day and finally shared my story of moving here. After we got home, I was so moved and inspired that that actually happened. I felt like the story was so UNREAL as to how God worked out ever facet of my move to the DR. I needed that reminder while I am in this waiting stage.
I'll just wait. I dont know how to do anything without Him anymore. Exactly the way I want it to be: Him, not me. I suck at life, I need Jesus. Waiting doesn't mean there is a lack of progress...
Seriously? I am a little shocked, too, that 6 months has come already. I just grabbed my journal to read what I wrote that day: I keep asking God for strength to do this alone. He told me Josh 1:9. So, I keep saying it (over and over again) and it helps give me relief.
I remember that day so vividly. I told myself not to cry, not once, or I would continue to breakdown. So I played calm as much as I could to everyone around me.
***Joshua 1:9 This is my command—be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”
I posted the rest of that journal a few blog entries ago and talked about dying to oneself and wanting to do His will for my life, yet desperately wanting to hold on to America. So, God told me to go to a different church a few weeks ago, so I got up and went to see this young girl that attends their school program for teen rehabilitation/church. I had felt her on my heart for a couple weeks, so I went. She gravitates towards me when I see her. I am still praying about that situation. So, there was a seat open next to her, of course. During the sermon the pastor spoke about dying to oneself and stated that he wasnt even sure what that "really" means. I realized I had my journal in my purse...why? I dont even know. I dont carry it. I dont even write in it as much. It was a beautiful gift my friend, Chase, gave me with Bible verses on each page the day I left Chain of Lakes Elem. So, I took the journal out and told the young girl next to me that I DID know what it meant and let her read my journal's first entry in coming to the country (I freaking love God and how He works). She asked if I didnt like it in the DR and I told her "it didnt matter. However, I do love the DR, but it wasnt ever in my plans." I still cannot believe I moved here. I live here. She asked how long I would be here and I gave her my answer that I say to everyone: When God tells me to go elsewhere.... but I am pretty sure He has me here for a lifetime.
As for what I am up to in this country, who knows, really. I am just here waiting on God. I am still at JCS teaching 1st grade. I will definitely blog on that soon. have a new roommate, Kelsey. I am seriously blessed with 2 great, Jesus-loving ladies to live with! I have enjoyed our late night Jesus talks and being in this same house for a purpose, growth in Him through each other. Kelsey is also my intern in first grade. This is the First Grade House!
So I am waiting for direction. Next steps. Something, God. Something. One time His voice was so LOUD and clear to move me here. If you didnt read that part, go back. He was LOUD. He was CLEAR in His promise of guiding and watching over and counseling me in my steps. Psalms 32:8 I never once said, "I THINK God said" during that time. I knew exactly what He was saying. I MISS THAT! I NEED THAT.
God has used me for years as a spiritual coach to so many people; mainly women, but not always limited to just them. I just realized this a few weeks ago when I started a new book in a little group Luke started on Christian Coaching. I saw the pattern before, but not so strategic. So, sometimes, it is friends that I only stay in touch with for the sporadic questions about Him through email, textplus, or Facebook. Some are my girls from work or my old Jesus Group. Sometimes, I barely know them. We may not be BFFs but it is an intimate friendship to just be honest and the door is open to ask whatever. Most of the time it is a message through Facebook of people searching for answers. God is good. He can and will use anything, including Facebook. When it comes to God, I am very honest and tell you like it is... it is relaxed, not rehearsed, and I think that is why I get messages on almost a weekly basis from people asking how I got to know Him this way. I dont have all the answers and I dont know half the answers most Christians know...(I looked at my friend Trevor in church a few weeks ago when he was in the DR and said, I dont even know all the books locations in the Bible!)....I should practice some little ditty to learn them!! but I do know Jesus in a very personal way. A very different way.
If you've ever had a conversation with me, I bet I squeezed in the love of my life, Jesus, when I got some minutes...and it may have been in a bar :) ...I want you to know Him.
I say all that because last week one of my friends steered me in a new direction. Something, I am not use to when it comes to God. I am usually focused and on track. I GIVE Christian advice and coach others. It's what He has prompted me to do for years. I am not a surface friend, I go deep. I want to invest energy in others growth in Him. I want you to thirst for Him the way I do. As Christians, we should make disciples and coach each other in growth...at least that is what we should be doing as Followers.
Who is in your zone of proximal development??? (Okay that is an educ term, but I can so see it applying to Christian discipleship). It's an honest question to ask yourself...
So, Heather came out and told me that I need to get back on track with reading my Bible, listening to worship music, and listening to sermons online. (Note: this is what I NEED to hear His voice) I had gotten so off track of getting in my time with Him and didnt realize how far I let it go. It is far harder to live with people than I realized!! I don't have hours a day anymore of spending just with Him. I talk with people more and let the other things slip. She was stern, or atleast, I took her text that way. I needed to hear it and she said it. Sometimes, people do that in our lives. We need to listen and do it when it is Biblical advice. I was just use to being the one helping others work through thoughts and things; what to do to stay or get on His path for life. Thanks, Heather <3 She has been sending me vital scripture that is always on target. God is awesome like that. She reminds me what He has done and will do. I've been grateful God has put her in my life and is growing her little heart in Him. I miss talking with God like I use to and I am making time again for what is imperative in my life: Him. I cant do it without Him. I dont know what to do next. I am playing follow the Leader here! I don't move an inch without Him directing the step. I saw Him blow it out of the water before and I'll wait to hear the next direction. I was waiting for the bathroom today and started to talk to God about something so insignificant. I instantly smiled when I realized I was talking to Him casually again! I whispered, "Oh, how I miss this Lord. Keep me here. Drawwwwwww me close."
I was walking with Kelsey the other day and finally shared my story of moving here. After we got home, I was so moved and inspired that that actually happened. I felt like the story was so UNREAL as to how God worked out ever facet of my move to the DR. I needed that reminder while I am in this waiting stage.
I'll just wait. I dont know how to do anything without Him anymore. Exactly the way I want it to be: Him, not me. I suck at life, I need Jesus. Waiting doesn't mean there is a lack of progress...
No comments:
Post a Comment