Come Away With Me

We went to Cabarete today.  I gave the day a 10.  Just glorious.  There is something about the sea that screams GOD.  Right?  That calmness that you can't describe. You just cant find it anywhere else on this planet but when your bottom is planted on the beach somewhere-- as the vastness of the waters engulfs your crazy head and causes PEACE.  Ahhh.  I love it.  Even if you swear there is no God, when you get to the beach you know that there is "something to this beauty."  God. 

Jaci took the van and we piled in a bunch of gringos and dominicanos early this morning.  Luke drove like an absolute crazy man, yet we always felt safe and I'm not too sure why.  We had to stop to pee and everyone jumped out at this corner-store at about 930AM.  The bathroom they let us use was in their house.  I just said HOUSE.  They let about 5 strangers line up- one by one and use their home's bathroom.  5 people that are not natives of their country.  Picture this in America.  This would never happen.  We would never open our house for 5 foreigners to come on in and line up and use the restroom speaking another language.  "They could rob or kill us!  They are strangers!"  Not here.  You are in dire need of a bathroom? Well, come on in!" They actually offered up a couch, too, for us to sit and wait.  Seriously?   I went back to the van to grab some cash and ask the Dominican youth kids about how much and they said, "No!  You dont have to pay them.  You have to use the bathroom, just go!  Of course they let you in to do that, you should let someone use the bathroom!"  My Spanish isnt great but that is what  I understood.  This blew my mind.  I ran back in and peed and hoped Toshi knew how to flush bc Nay and I didnt know how.  I always keep a roll of toilet paper in my purse in a baggie (in case it rains adn my purse gets soaked while I am walking), so we didnt have to use up their supply.  (I think we used this roll about 3 different times today. Thank goodness, i had it, a lot of places dont!) I told the family eating breakfast thank you so much in Spanish and layed some cash on the table.  They tried to talk back but I kept walking bc I wanted to leave money.   (The bathroom also had a bathtub and the shower head was high on the wall but was a faucet, not a spray spout.  The house was small and baby chicks were running around the corner-store and the house.)  I brought this back up twice on the ride.  I couldnt stop thinking about how OPEN they were to strangers.  Wow.  We headed to paradise :)

I instantly smile when I see the ocean.  How can you not?  I whisper, "Hey, God! Morning."  <3

I hear Him so well when I am at the beach/laying in the sun at the pool/roof.  For me to listen, I need to quiet my thoughts and shutdown my inner-voice.  Be still.   I talk to the Lord all the time throughout my day.  Sometimes, I even forget I am not alone and I will find myself audibly speaking to Him at the store.  BUT there is a difference when I am just sitting or laying there.  I can stop my mind of all other things and just BE STILL and ask Him, "what do You have to say to me today?"  He always answers.  Maybe not what I want to hear, but I get answers.  I am working through a few things and searching for guidance.  Actually, clarity.  I know one part, yet the other is still yet to be revealed. The main thing He said was just come enjoy Me today.  Be here and Be still.  So I did.  I layed out half sleeping and half praying while reading my Passport book on a missionary.  I ask the Lord why am I reading about little kids that are sleeping in trees in Sudan because they dont have homes??  All the while, I am laying on the beach enjoying the feeling of being wrapped in the love of my Lord.  Why are these kids falling out of trees and dying from hyenas eating them when they drop?  Why are widows and children the biggest people group in Sudan that are dying of lack of basic needs?  All the while, I am laying on the beach enjoying His presence and beauty.  I DO NOT UNDERSTAND and He didnt answer that part.  He just said, "Come away with me, love.  Calm yourself and just be here, right now."  He loves those kids just as much as He loves me and I wont ever understand why I get to sleep in safety every night and I have never had to cry to God that I am starving.  I am thankful for what I have and what He will continue to provide. 

I understand evil and I understand that we, as humans, have created this off balance feature where we overuse/abuse.  I just don't understand why I get to live a beautiful, very loved life and there are others that are dying unspeakable deaths.  I put my book down to just breathe it all in.  Be still and be here.


Sometimes if people are talking around me, I get off centered. So I moved to quiet myself, so I did that by sitting by the water and then, walking a little.  I require more alone time then most people.  It isnt good or bad, it is just how I am wired.  I hear Him clearer when I am just with Him figuring things out.


The water always reminds me how awesome He is.  I find myself telling Him how cool, majestic, magnificent, beautiful, creative, awesome, etc etc He is in nature.  I repeat it over and over as He reveals Himself.  I have actually never seen sea urchins until today.   I secretly wished my brother Michael was there because he would eat it up!  Ethan found some sort of sea cucumber, I think.  God, those are so cool!  It was gathering into a ball every time I would pick it up at one side.  It was incredibly gooey and gross, too!  Haha!  I always find myself asking God why He made so many funky things you find in the sea...  He is more creative and brilliant than we can even grasp in our little minds.  His depths...we just dont even know.  I thank Him for all the cool things and today for that sea cucumber and this fluorescent green plant I kept seeing that was incredible to the eye.

I praised Him for this time we have  right now to bask in His love as we adjust to this new home.  We are on summer break from school and it has been so  nice to have downtime from the CRAZINESS of the last few months of life.  I am so blessed.  He is so good to me.  I have needed this time so badly to just regroup on life change.  As I sat on the beach and watched them surf, I told God I didnt know why He allowed us to be there and enjoy His Earth and magnificence today, but that I thank Him for this day and what He has given me.    I prayed for guidance and reassurance of my future.  I thanked Him for promising to never leave me or forsake me (Heb 13:5) and for ADVISING my perfect path when I seek His counsel and that He WATCHES ME (Psalms 32:8).  He reminded me that, "Child, I moved you there.  Soon enough, when you are ready, I will reveal what is next.  Sit and bask what I have created for you right now and leave the future to me.  You cannot conjure up what ONLY I can do."  I want to yell, "send us into the war zone", so to speak.  Get the ball rolling!  That isnt what is intended right now.  I told Him my requests and what I thought and told Him I will do as He says, never moving forward without His guidance. I have learned so much about myself the last 5 months.  I have learned a lot about Who He is, too.  And in the last few weeks, the Ostbergs and I are learning to communicate as a unit.  We have been friends for years, but there is a huge difference living upstairs from one another and working in ministry on a daily basis together and hanging out with friends on special occasions.  I didn't expect this part the way it is unfolding.  God is working on us and through us.  This isn't a small part of the picture.  IT IS A HUGE part of what is to COME.  Laying the foundation, if you will.  That is what He tells me.  He does not "waste time."  Jesus keeps repeating that to me.  This down time is for a purpose. 

This part is IMPERATIVE. 

I came home to my friend Melissa leaving a message on Facebook about one of my Honduras posts.  I went back to read it and God spoke very loudly to me about it.  Jeony waits on the Lord.  I will, too.  I texted Naomi tonight about a possible decision and she texted back to always do what God says to do no matter what. 

There is no other option, I told her.  If God does not tell me to do it, I can't do it.  I can't say yes to an opportunity if God does not specifically tell me to do it.  My faith rides on Him directing my path.  I am teaching 1st grade in a few weeks unless God says otherwise before then!

I wish He would give some more specific DIRECTIONS these days.  :)  Until then, Ill be still and seek Him.

Dear Jesus, I love You MUCHO!!  <3